5 Annoying Things People Have Said/Asked Me During Pregnancy: First Trimester Edition

Pregnancy has a habit of removing all (or the little bit of) tact that people seem to have. Apparently NOTHING is off limits to say/ask a pregnant chic these days. I'm compiling a list of annoying things that people say to me throughout this pregnancy because..... I just like to reminisce on people's lack of intelligence sometimes.

• Take your vitamins! OK this doesn't really annoy me because honestly, my memory is crap nowadays. I'd probably forget if I wasn't reminded daily. But a reminder is enough! I don't need you to physically force the vitamins down my throat! It's come close. LOL
• Are you guys gonna get married? Eventually.... that's the plan. Am I gonna run off and get married because I'm pregnant? NO. I live in 2014 not 1814. I want to get married for love, not because I got pregnant and people think it's the "right thing" to do. 
• You need to eat. Ya don't say? I've only managed to keep myself alive the better part of 24 years. Don't know how I would've survived without that little gem there!
• Was it planned? So now I need to know what exactly you're asking. Was having sex planned? Was having a baby planned? Was making the baby the day I had sex planned? What exactly are you asking me? What part of my private life  EXACTLY are you trying to invade? 
• How's "your boyfriend" handling it? This one probably irritates me the most. Because to me... this makes me feel like I trapped him in some sort of way. How SHOULD he be handling it? Are you expecting him to be handling it poorly? WTF does "handling it" mean? That sounds like someone died. Babies are exciting! We've never given an indication of having a poor or irresponsible relationship. So he's handling it like anyone else who's excited to be having a child handles it. TUH!

This is only the first trimester edition because I know it continues. It'll only get worse and I'll only get more impatient with people. I can't wait til people start telling me how big/small I am or impose their opinions on everything that I plan on doing. That's when the real fun begins =)

**sh*t that almost made the list includes: You're not breastfeeding are you? You have a little pudge, but you had some fat anyway. How old are you, 14? (that was actually a doctor!), etc.** 

Expect the Unexpected =]

Gross? Sorry not sorry =P

I contemplated for so long when would be the right time.. or the safe time.. or even a good time to blog about my little surprise. I've pretty much concluded that no time is the "safe time". Life comes at you so unexpectedly and anything can happen.

So here goes.... Super excited to be embarking on this new journey and also excited that I have this blog to document everything.

11w5d.. Coming Nov 2014. =)

Hello Lovelies [[A Couple Changes]]

I was contemplating for a long time just discontinuing use of this blog and then moving on to something new, but i feel like this blog is my baby. The archives though not lengthy, show the history of this blog and in a sense the history of me.

Life is always always changing. There's nothing wrong with that. Change is good. And I think it'll be interesting for anyone new that comes along to see the evolution the blog posts have gone through.

All that being said. Look forward to something new! Be back soon.

 Love you guys.

The 1 Reason (if there were no others) Why You Should Schedule Posts inAdvance

Because sh*t happens.

You see this? I haven't posted again for a week. Because life is so busy and I'm trying to catch up. I always have a million ideas and I am a habitual procrastinator. I'm such a last minute child. 

In the past I didn't believe in scheduling posts. I felt like genuine ideas come and at the time they come that's when you should write. But then I get more than 1 idea. Or the time never opens up for me to write. Or I spend 6 hours in the ER the day I plan to post... And then my poor blog gets left in the dust. 

And then people stop reading, and I cry. You see the vicious cycle?

Please schedule your posts. Even if you just plan 2 ahead. At least you'll have a backup in case sh*t does happen (which it so kindly has a tendency to do just when you're trying to get everything together). Your readers will love you for it. 

You guys still love me, right?

Loving A Millenial

Pic via Google Images

Lord knows I never thought I would SERIOUSLY quote a drake song. But yup, it's happening.

I am sometimes so so ashamed to be apart of this generation. On top of that being African-American and apart of this generation sometimes feels like a double negative. I find myself shaking my head at something almost every day (Sharkiesha? yea I'm still holding onto that.) because we (as young people) go SO hard about how others give us a bad rep and don't take the time to seriously consider the reputation we are giving ourselves. It's so sad.

I honestly thank God everyday for my relationship. We seriously live in a time where people don't even take THAT seriously. It's annoying. The countless attempts I have had from guys trying to get me to cheat on or lie to my boyfriend.... it's amazing. Living in the era of the hook-up. Walk down the street and ask 5 20-something year old's (that's so not a word, I know people) if they are familiar with the term chivalry. It's almost non-existent. I see so many of my female friends settling and it makes me upset. They settle for the "relationship" with no title. They settle for their boyfriend who cheats on them, or hurts them, or isn't even there at all because they find it easier than going through the SLEW of immature guys to find someone who will treat them like a person. And for what? The sake of not being "alone" I suppose. I don't get it. It doesn't seem worth it.

Maybe I'm an old soul. Cause I want that me and you against the world type love. I don't need social media validation type love. Our relationship is private but I'm not a secret type love.

It's hard finding love with a millennial... but I can't imagine settling.

Sunday Confessionals - I am easily Overwhelmed (sometimes)

Hence my lack of posting this week. And I had some stuff lined up that I should have gotten taken care of but I just completely could not get myself to do anything related to having to touch my computer. Sorry I sucked this week.

On top of my multiple doctors visits, some stuff has just completely took over my brain. All is fine now though but I'm still absorbing. Sometimes its hard for me not to obsess, and to stay distracted and just chill out. I am an over thinker by nature. I like to have an exact plan and know exactly what's happening when and sometimes life isn't like that. I'm learning to take things in stride. Wish me luck!

How'd the week go for everyone else?

You Can Say I'm a Dreamer...

Pic Courtesy of Google Images 

I am feeling way to lazy to make my own image today. I was doing good too but today I am just NOT up for it. LOL

Anywhos... I have seen this quote fluttering around the social mediasphere quite often the passed couple days and personally, as a big dreamer, I love it! I am at constant battle with myself all the time because I have a severe case of "own worst enemy". I find that often, I have such high ambitions and then I usually talk myself out of it telling myself it's not "realistic" or that it's going to be "too hard" or take "too long" or be "too much". 

So seeing this has definitely helped snap me back into my own reality. You HAVE to dream big. No one else is going to dream for you. And if you don't follow your dreams you most definitely will work for the rest of your life for someone who did. It's absolutely OK to dream big. 

And when you think the dream is TOO big... "you mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger darling" (anyone else love Inception? Just me? K cool!) 

SUNDAY CONFESSIONALS - I HAVE A HARD TIME ACCEPTING APOLOGIES

The title pretty much sums it up. I'm pretty sure I could write nothing at all in this whole post and you guys would probably get it. But that wouldn't be any fun at all and I figured it would be interesting to give everyone  a little weekly peek into who I am. Thus I've come up with a little blog series:

Sorry (NOT REALLY) if you guys are tired of seeing black and purple around here.. my favorite colors can you tell? LOL

It could be daddy issues.. when I was growing up my father made me promise after promise and almost never went through with them. It could be relationship issues.. I was a victim of domestic violence and we all know that the abusers favorite line is "I'm Sorry". Or it could just be mental issues because anyone who knows me knows that I'm a little cray cray and possibility a little bit dramatic.

Whatever the issue is, I hate when people apologize to me. There is a very very rare occasion where I find myself having to apologize to someone. You know why? I'm a thinker. I think very very carefully about my actions and my words. If I make a promise or give someone my word about something, then I go through with what I said. 

So to me, "I'm sorry" is a cop out. I'm sorry means ... my bad for being a complete a**hat unable to think logically beyond the means of myself. I literally cringe and my whole body tenses up when anyone apologizes to me because I hate it THAT much.

I'm not completely psycho though, I don't like punch people in the throat for apologizing when they accidentally bump into me on the street. I don't mean like the regular "this was a complete accident I'm sorry" because I am well aware that accidents happen. And you can totally tell when someone is being genuine about their apology or when it's a "lemme apologize because that's probably what they wanna hear apology". I hate those. I'd rather you just give me the finger and walk away. Don't fake/cop out apologize to me. I might punch you.

Sunday - Week in Review

I spent a lot of time thinking this week. I am definitely a chronic over-thinker and I can't remember if I've mentioned that here previously. But yea my mind is constantly on a thousand and sometimes the thoughts pile so high that I don't know where to release them. That's my current blogging dilemma. I have so many ideas that I don't know how to organize them.

My birthday was Wednesday. I didn't feel extra celebratory because as my boyfriend hates for me to say, I feel like I am getting old. But I've concluded (like many before me) that men and women have a completely different concept of time, and also that I have way way high expectations of myself for being 24. *shrugs*

I did go out briefly last night and made an attempt to enjoy some of my youth LOL. Didn't go quite as planned but I enjoy good times with good people and I'm learning to make the best out of every situation. Plus alcohol makes everything briefly more enjoyable and so I lived with it.

How was your week? Anyone have any quarter life crisis advice?

(P.S. A couple of the blogs that I read inspired me to include pictures in every post even if it's just a design-y type one like the one i posted at the beginning of this post. Check out Alisha , Rebecca and Kat who not only post great content but always have very visually appealing posts =). And I'm a very visual person so it makes sense.)

Taking Baby Steps to Healthier Eating

So I'm pretty sure sometime last year (here) I posted about my big belly problems LOL. It's actually gotten a lot better and I'm sad to admit that it had a lot to do with poor diet. 

I am 110 pounds on a good day LOL.. but in the past a lot of times my stomach has been so bloated that I have the appearance of a muffin top. Not OK at all. So I am slowly but surely taking baby steps to eating better because I think its helpful in more than one aspect. 

My boyfriend and I eat out multiple times a week and sometimes multiple times a day. Not because neither one of us can cook.. but because both of us are flat out... lazy. We would save so much more money if we made the stuff that we are constantly spending money buying because none of it costs that much in the grocery store.

I eat multiple times a day. And when I say multiple I mean like........ 6 LOL. I feel like I am constantly hungry and that constantly warrants snacking so I am constantly eating GARBAGE. I'm working on buying healthier things because eating chips and drinking soda all day.... yea no.. can we say diabetes? And last night when I decided it was time for a snack... I didn't feel the need to eat again after. Peanut butter is pretty filling (and that's good protein right? Please say yes!) LOL

I've almost completely stopped drinking soda. And by that I mean.. once or twice a week. Which is amazing for me because I was a multiple bottle/can of Pepsi a day girl and water has NEVER been my friend. I'm still working on the water part because I'm mostly drinking juice now but I think I'm doing a lot better than I have been and that's what counts! 

BABY STEPS FOR ME!

What do you guys do to stay healthy?

Finding a Hobby... The Dilemma

I wouldn't go as far as saying that I am having an all out identity crisis..... but I'm bordering it. LOL
I love love blogging. I love to write. I love the feeling I get from the keys underneath my fingers.
It all makes sense for me. It adds up.
But there are days truthfully when I don't feel like writing. And I would love to have interaction with humans outside of the blogosphere LOL.

Confessions of an introvert.
I don't do well with the friendship thing. And not because I'm mean or anything (even though I have my moments) but because when I finally warm up to someone, I put my all into my friendships and I usually get half-***ed reciprocation. So I don't go out of my way to make the effort anymore. I keep to myself and I read, or write or listen to music and pretend I can sing... or I harass my poor boyfriend lol. Who is the complete opposite from me and very much has a life.

So I've been thinking about what I can do and I'm making mental lists and all that jazz. Cause it's time to spread my wings! I am a (almost) 24 year old trapped in a 40 year old life. LOL

What is everyone doing for fun nowadays?

Transitioning Update: Braidout Success!!

So after my mini chop I kept my hair straight for a full gross 6 weeks lol. I am somewhat ashamed (somewhat not) about that because that means I didn't wash my hair the entire six weeks I wore it straight. I maintained it with oil and by wrapping my hair and that's pretty much what I did.

Part of my reasoning in my head for this was honestly, I was nervous. I knew once I washed my hair and it reverted that with the shrinkage it'd be a lot shorter and I wasn't sure how it'd look if I tried braid outs or Bantu Knots on them. 

WELP!!

Something had to give because I was starting to become ashamed of my dirtiness lmao (it really wasn't that bad only I knew I hadn't washed my hair but I just feel like 6 weeks is too long if you aren't protective styling lol). So yesterday I washed my hair, and used my new hooded bonnet to deep condition (review coming soon =D) and then after that I braided my hair into 8 plaits and air-dried overnight. This morning I unbraided (and my boyfriend HAD to get involved as usual lol) and I have been super excited all day! I can't wait til my natural hair is longer and it looks fuller. I feel like this was pretty successful for me.

Anyone else having a good hair day? 

The Plague.

That's what I feel like I'm recovering from. My boyfriend had the flu, so I stayed with him to take care of him and then of course I caught it. And I have been miserable!! I'm feeling much much better now but I still don't feel motivated to do much of anything and I can't get rid of my cough. And since I have asthma, when I cough every single time it feels like a lung is going to fall out... especially when it's a dry cough.

I can't believe tomorrow is going to be February. I'll be 24 in 19 days and I am NOT looking forward to aging LOL. It's not the same exciting feeling I felt when 21 was coming, now I just feel like I'm getting older and so I should be doing MORE. I always feel like I should be doing more though, I'm a chronic over-worker. 

What's everyone been up to? 

Temper, Temper

I wouldn't go all the way as far as saying that I have a BAD temper... cause no one with one wants to actually admit that LOL. But I am known for being a little firecracker. It's something that I honestly can't help. I am usually very quiet and calm (now anyway) unless I feel VERY strongly about something. Then when I do... its 0-1000 in less than a second and it's VERY hard to bring me back down. It takes HOURS sometimes for me to calm down.

That's one thing that I am trying to work on bettering. I don't want to be KNOWN for having a bad attitude because that's usually how it comes across and it really surprises people cause I am otherwise very sweet LOL. I definitely need to take up yoga or something LOL.

How do you keep calm?

There's only up from here!.

google image

I am diligently working on personal growth and with that comes growth as a blogger. I want my blog to definitely show me but also be purposeful and make sure that my readers are getting something out of it as well. This year is going to be all about growth for me because I honestly feel I NEVER have time to plateau. I am probably one of those people who are never satisfied... its cool with me... Greatness doesn't come from complacency.

How are you working on your growth this year?

P.S. Who loves my new blog design as much as I do? Much more aesthetically pleasing in my opinion. Check out Rekita's beautiful blog or her Etsy design shop, all the credit for my new look goes to her amazing self! <3 

Welcome, 2014!

All the initial excitement of the new year has died down and while I still see the occasional new year, new me posts, they've all pretty much disappeared *insert sigh of relief*. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for people changing... but I wouldn't mind if we all thought of a new, maybe individual phrase so that we weren't all ringing in cliches as the clock struck midnight.

As for me, I am looking forward to the new year being a year of growth. I spent much of 2013 in misery. Don't get me wrong I was generally happy, but at the same time I was dying for change. I felt like I was stuck in a place where I couldn't thrive at all. It was not working for me.

I quit my job the day after Christmas. So many people don't understand my reasoning behind it but to me it makes perfect sense. I am trying to grow into a certain type of person. My job was not allowing me to grow. And not at all in the sense that they weren't supportive because I had an amazing support system during my last couple of months, but the job was not for me. I got no sense of satisfaction out of what I was doing and I most often felt defeated. If you hate your job, quit it.

So of course I didn't quit without a back up plan and I'm very excited about work now. I feel happier in a place where I am allowed to express myself as an individual and not just force something on people based on company standards. I no longer feel robotic.

I am looking forward to 2014 with an extremely new insight. This year is all about growing as a person, spiritually, a blogger, a girlfriend, a big sister, and so much more. 2014 is MY year. This year I am looking forward to being not a new person, but a better one. The only way to go is up.

Top 5 Favorite Christmas Songs!

3 days away from my second favorite holiday of the year (my birthdays first DUH!) and I'm honestly ready for it to come and GO! lol. I just thought I'd share some of my favorite Christmas songs... while I'm still in the holiday spirit and Scrooge hasn't taken over.

5. Destiny's Child - Opera of the Bells - I'm pretty sure Destiny's Child is the reason I've known the words to Carol of the Bell's for so long... especially because in my mind I sing amazingly and it's a fun song to sing.



4. NSync - Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays - LOL in all the time that I've loved this song... it's actually my first time seeing this extremely corny video. HAHA... This was also way before me and Justin Timberlake's love affair (in case you didn't know.. its real... he loves me)... =)



3. Boyz II Men - Let it Snow - I love love love Boyz II Men!! Thinking about this song made me actually wanna do a top list of their songs that I love. LOL. I used this clip from the Fresh Prince because it also happens to be one of my favorite episodes! lol.



2. Chris Brown - This Christmas - Oh Christopher, what's happened to you?! This was the pre-cray cray Chris that my teenage heart and raging hormones loved to loved! Despite him losing his friggin' marbles, I still adore him and this song! We can spend Christmas together Chris  *winks... blows kisses*



1. Mariah Carey - All I Want for Christmas - I'm not going to lie, for a good amount of time I had this song in my regular iTunes playlist, and I was listening to it no matter what time of year it was. All I Want for Christmas, in July..... No shame... Didn't care... LOL... I'm pretty sure Mariah is the one who took me passed Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer and made me love Xmas music like I haven't before. I don't think I'll ever get tired of this song!!

 
 (and for any Beliebers... or closeted Beliebers.. there's a more recent version with Justin's ever so classy self! LOL)

What are your favorite Christmas Songs? Give me some more YouTube video's to watch! LOL

xXTanay

Reflection.

Straight from under the dryer! lol

Sitting in the hair salon typing this post from my phone as usual LOL. I've actually become pretty accustomed to the idea of typing from my phone... I know I won't be hardly ever publishing from my phone without editing first but there's nothing wrong with getting the initial ideas out right away when they come to mind. That's how I have to begin to discipline myself. I'm determined to grow as a blogger #ByAnyMeansNecessary and that pretty much means if I gotta do the phone thing.... The ideas have to be drafted SOMEWHERE.

My post last night was random. I'm super emotional. One of my biggest flaws is I'm a people pleaser. I'm happy and I so desperately want people to be happy.. And to be happy with me. So when multiple people in a day throw their unhappiness at me... *cue meltdown*. I wanted to be alone. I wanted to curl up and never come out of bed and not be forced to deal with people who I felt were ungrateful and could not appreciate the fact that I was working to please them. 

And some of my post last night was true. There is a lot of people/things/places that I need to separate myself from. When people are not depositing positive energy into you they are withdrawing the happiness you've saved up for yourself. I can't keep allowing people to make such drastic transactions. I work hard on my happiness. 

xXTanay 

A Break.

Mentally and emotionally going through a lot right now. I've removed all social media from my phone for a while and I'm contemplating what I want to do as far as blogging before the new year. Part of me wants nothing more than to write. Reading and writing are my safe haven. A part of me wants to stay in isolation. There's a lot I need to separate myself from. I just need to go about it effectively. Blog-wise though. I expect 2014 to be great for me. Thanks for being amazing whoever has still stuck around.

xXTanay

Would You Rather: Makeup Tag

First, lemme start off by saying I have been a sucky blogger this past week. I'm really just soaking in some of the advice I've been reading and trying to plan out ways to become better at what I enjoy doing. So stick around, thank you to those who have been here, you guys are amazing and I love how patient you've all been with me! *kisses*

My blog baby Miya tagged me in the Makeup Tag! Go check out some of her answers (and here are mine)

1. Would you rather lose all of your mascaras, eyeliners, lipsticks, and lip glosses or lose all of your palettes and eye shadows?

 I rarely wear eye shadow LOL. so those could go and I wouldn't blink twice.

2. Would you rather chop off all your hair or never be able to cut it again?

At this moment, I'd love to chop off all my hair. It'd grow back! Plus I'm dying to be fully natural lol so this relaxed hair could GO!

3. Would you rather have a coral cheek or a pink cheek?

Coral usually looks better. 

4. If you had £1000 to spend, would you rather buy clothes or makeup?

Clothes. Even though I could use more makeup I am a true clothes girl! I have enough clothes to not do laundry for a couple months. (I tried that once, that was the laundry trip from HELL)

5. Would you rather apply lipstick as eyeliner, or eyeliner as lipstick?

Eyeliner as a lipstick, they make some pretty colored eyeliner. 

6. Would you rather only shop at Mac or Sephora?

Mac. Even though its more expensive I actually get more useful help from the people there.

7. Would you rather only use one eye shadow color or one lip color for the rest of your life?

One eyeshadow color. I don't care about eye shadow  I could do fine with a neutral eye shadow  (same answer as Miya)

8. Would you rather wear winter clothes in the summer, or summer clothes in the winter?

Summer clothes in the winter! U can layer up and get warm but if I had over sized sweaters on with this NYC heat!!! LAWD I cant even imagine lol. 

9. Would you rather have dark nails or bright nails all year round?

Bright nails, Bright purple too probably =). I like purple nail polish LOL

10. Would you rather give up your favorite lip product or your favorite eye product?

My favorite eye product! I'd die if I couldn't wear lipgloss my lips get TOO dry lol.

11. Would you rather only be able to wear your hair in a ponytail or a messy bun?

Messy bun. Ppl feel inclined to touch my hair when its in a ponytail since its long LOL. 

12. Would you rather never be able to paint your nails again or never use lip gloss?

Yea, refer to 10. Dry lips are a definite NO for me. 

13. Would you rather shave your eyebrows and have none at all or sharpie them in everyday?

OH GOD. I guess id rather have none at all lol. I couldn't imagine drawing my eyebrows in with sharpie LOL super dark eyebrows look weird on my face. 

14. Would you rather live without makeup or nail polish?

Nail polish!!

I'm a simple girl when it comes to makeup, most days I only wear foundation and gloss. I have no desire to get super pretty for the people at my place of work LOL. I usually only do more if I'm going out with friends/bf and even then its still not THAT much work. I try to still look like the same person so I dont scare anyone when the makeup is actually off =P LOL

I'm honestly not sure who to tag cause I dont know whos still around these days LOL. but please feel free to answer on your own and Link in the comment box to let me know that you answered as well =)

xxTanay